My strong-willed, intelligent, athletic, beautiful, almost 6 feet 13 year old daughter wants to attend high school. The mere thought of it terrifies me. It's not going to happen (as long as I'm alive), however I'm willing to compromise to some degree.

I know she wants to go for the sports opportunities and the possible friendships. The thing is, she has both within her current and past daily life now. My husband and I have always been mindful home-school parents. Not your traditional or stereotypical home-schoolers {I won't define or elaborate on  what that profile tends to be here}. Nor are our reasons for home-schooling traditional or stereotypical. Neither are our methods and philosophies.

We've always made sure our kids were not only academic, but also they both were/are athletic. And skilled in the various competitive sports they participate.

They both are socially intelligent. Meaning they can have a substantive or silly conversation with anyone.  Friendships and quality relationships are abundant in their lives. We are continuously complimented on the human beings we've raised. Though it's an uphill battle at times, we wouldn't trade the honor of being their parents for anything.

Now, when my severely hormonal daughter gets in one of her moods. When she's combative and defiant, and bullheaded, she gears in that sensitive area that will get at me most, "well, I'm going to high school!" - disrespectfully blurted without thought mostly when she's not getting what she wants.

I'm like, she has no idea what school is like. How most traditionally schooled youth would easily trade lives with her. No, we are not wealthy or permissive, but we do make sure she is nurtured and educated and thriving in life. She's never bored or overstimulated.

Parenting is so hard. Days when I feel we got this, we're gliding through tiny parenting obstacles as if we are Teflon, our dear daughter says or does something to place our smug behinds back on that treacherous, hormonal, no-fun roller coaster ride -- instantly back to reality.

Taking her phone, limiting her computer access, giving her written consequences (usually extra research or math assignments), telling her, "NO" is as if we are hanging her by her disobedient tongue. Naked and wet to a splintered wooden post and beating her nonstop with piece of hot metal.

There has to be rules and boundaries and expectations. On top of that, we have to pay attention, meaning not go to sleep at the wheel of parenting.

Even when my daughter died (2000), when my health changed (2014), those unthinkable, unbearable life crisis did not deter us from parenting. All along it's been just us (and hopefully we've been quality role models on how to survive and stay positive regardless).

No, we are not in our kids behinds 24/7 but we are close enough to smell their  @#%& if it stinks.

I remember when our 21 year old son was her age. The educational choices were a mild stress even then. Our son wasn't begging to go to high school or anything. But we were contemplating allowing him to attend a local high school then, for the overall experience. Something changed our minds quickly & definitely though. And that was that. We never looked back. He was then tested, later enrolled in our local junior college where he thrived academically, socially. Graduated with multiple degrees and with honors at 16. He is now at a highly ranked college of his choice on an academic scholarship about to graduate this May.

We don't expect our daughter to duplicate our son. However, she is qualified, just as academic (and athletic) as he was/is. So the sky is the limit for her, and as parents, we do have certain expectations. I'm sure once the hormones settle she'll be back to her reasonable and sweet, Care Bear self. But as of  now, "beam me up Scotty!"

Omg! Where did February go?

Each new month for me, is like a new beginning of something significant. I feel similar pressures for self-improvement as I do for a brand New Year.

Last month, February 14th was the four year anniversary of my health change. I am glad to report that I continue to improve, I'm doing well actually. Yes, up's and down's but mostly up's, thankfully.

My most recent adventure has been advancing in swimming. In a previous blog I believe I mentioned how I've finally progressed to doing flip turns. Weeks ago I started incorporating flip turns to my 2 hours/4 days per week swim routine.

Flip turns have been a major goal. Being skilled at the quick transition of a flip, then turn, thus continue swimming uninterrupted. Wow, to be where I am now. It's so amazing. Considering I'm a fairly new swimmer. Learned in the summer of 2016. Since then, water has been a gift.

Every non-dialysis day I swim. As long as I don't have any open wounds, I'm in the pool. I was going to add, as long as I have no broken bones, but I proved that wrong. Lately I have been swimming with a fractured toe (which forced me to learn to swim without fin's - which is great). Before that, I swam with a fractured finger (which prevented me from blogging for a while).

I guess I have improved for a new month. Everything depends on ones perspective.